If you see me, you don’t merely see my color; but if you see only my color, then you see something about me, not me. If, for instance, you have a white friend, you notice, at first, that human being’s color, that he or she is different from you. But as your friendship with him or her deepens, as you get to know him or her as a person, you don’t analyze his or her color or facial features. For all practical purposes, they disappear, because you know him or her, not a category. In such instances, you rarely think about his or her color, because an “encounter” has been made, thus, going beyond the “aboutness” (e.g., color, facial or bodily features) of a human being to seeing or knowing him or her as a person. Thus, one helpful way to counteract racism is to get to know another human being as a person, a someone, another self, who is different from you as a person.
For further reading, see https://wordpress.com/post/lentsblog.org/624